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Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Devotions: Chocolate Zucchini Muffins

I've been terrible about posting lately.  It's funny; you'd think that I'd have more time, being a stay at home mom and all.  But life has had a funny way of catching me up in the current, and it's been moving pretty quickly.  I found myself nodding in agreement with Mel's recent posts about not being able to keep up: with Facebook feeds, Twitter feeds, blogging comments ... all of which I tend to put before my own writing.  Probably not ideal if you're aiming for regular writing practice, which was, once upon a time, the original purpose of this blog.

And then there's the job scene.  It turns out that I did, indeed, nail that interview.  I've had a tentative offer, and I'm going to talk with them about numbers tomorrow.  The down side is that the numbers are not good.  It's a grant, and they have a limited budget.  Like, $20K less than I was making limited.  And I'd need to pay for another child in day care (part of the craziness has been the search for, and interviews with, potential in-home day care providers), which makes the numbers look even worse.  And it's a grade lower, though that's a blow to my ego.  On the plus side, they are good people.  And it's an important project.  The question is whether it's the right decision for me.  I'm still not sure ... and am hoping I get some clarity, in a hurry.

In the meantime, one of our best friends was diagnosed with heart failure.  He is only a few years older than I am, and in incredible shape: runs half marathons without sweating, bikes miles and miles without a second thought, swims ... and is the energetic stay at home dad to two truly wonderful kids, aged 2 and 5.  It was such a shock to hear the news, and right now, it's hard to think of anything else.  Though today he's doing better, and his heart is beating on its own, there is still the possibility of a transplant, and even without that, the figuring out of what to do about help with the kids over these next few months.  Though this is going to sound ridiculous, part of me doesn't want to go back to work, so that I can help take care of his kids while he heals.  I've been watching my friends go through this, admiring their calm, level-headed strength, and wondering if I'd be capable of the same if I ever found myself where they are right now.

And in much more mundane news, our CSA continues to teach us to make do with what we're given.  As my son says (or rather, as his teacher taught him), "you get what you get, and you don't get upset."  It's been four weeks straight of not much else besides cucumbers and zucchini (and not even good produce, at that), and I've been trying to keep the menu interesting, with squash soup, zucchini frittata, calabacitas, zucchini crusted pizza, zuccanoes, zucchini pancakes (unlinked recipes coming soon) ... and these chocolate zucchini muffins.  They actually turned out quite well, and I froze them, and then ... well ... defrosted them and ate them.  Because they're, like, healthy.  Right?

In yoga this month, we were practicing Hanumanasana, which is basically a split.  Years ago, when I was taking regular dance classes, I could do splits; now, I am thankful for bolsters and blankets that my teacher surreptitiously places next to us as class is in session.  Hanumanasana teaches us to be completely open, but also to love where we're at instead of cursing ourselves for not getting it "right."  It symbolizes (and actually looks like) a leap of devotion, not necessarily to another, but possibly to ourselves, understanding that knowing deep love and knowing our highest selves is one in the same.  So much of where I am right now is mid-leap.  Perhaps that's the same for all of us?

Chocolate Zucchini Muffins
 
2 eggs
2 cups shredded zucchini
1 3/4 cup flour
1 cup buttermilk
2/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup oil
1/2 cup cocoa
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon cloves
1/4 teaspoon allspice

Preheat oven to 350. Grease and flour or line 12 wells in a muffin tin. Set aside. In a large bowl, mix together the eggs, oil and buttermilk. Add in all of the dry ingredients, including spices. Mix thoroughly. Stir in zucchini. Fill the prepared wells about 3/4 of the way. Bake 30-40 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the center muffin comes out mostly clean.

10 comments:

  1. I've been terrible about blogging, keeping up with life lately. Children kind of do demand attention like that....and life stuff. I'm not sure about the job. Will it lead you to a career path that will give you more satisfaction? Will it allow more flexibility to make up for the limitations in terms of pay? One friend that recently went to work for a non-profit agreed to take a pay cut if she could have every other Friday off. It worked for her. Just an idea. The zucchini muffins look delish. We're overflowing with cucumbers at our place. Seems the bunnies and squirrels like everything else. I can't blame them. Cucumbers aren't my favorite vegetable.

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  2. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend - that's awful. Sometimes bad news just comes from out of nowhere and that makes it very difficult to get your head around it. But I wish you clarity with your decision. It's a tough one. So many moving parts. Hoping that the way forward just becomes beautifully clear.

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  3. Lots in your post. I hope you figure it out and it goes how you want. I'm really sorry to hear about your friend. That is very unfortunate. The muffins look great. I kind of chuckled about your CSA. That has happened to us whenever we join. I decided to go to the farmer's market instead this year. I guess I have gotten spoiled with grocery store selection and imported veggies. Maybe I should just go to Chile during the winter. Then I'd be local again. :)

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  4. Sorry to hear about your friend's health problems. It's a great thought to drop everything to help out - just make sure you're doing what's best for you and your family too. Hoping you get that clarification!

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  5. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. I have to admit, I'm very ignorant of heart issues. I would never have assumed that someone leading a healthy life could encounter heart failure. I don't think I even know what heart failure is. And not to say it's okay if people who aren't healthy get heart failure but at least then there is an explanation. Or maybe it's just that at least then I know I can do something to avoid it MYSELF. Funny how when we are faced with tragedy we try to assure ourselves that it can't happen to us. The reality always is that it can.

    I hope you find clarity on the job front. I really do.

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  6. yay for a zucchini recipe!!

    i too have been terrible blogging, but for me it's been a months long problem... ah well. life happens, eh? :)

    i'm sorry about your friend. very scary, & i hope he pulls though ok.

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  7. My thoughts are with your friend. I hope that he's ok and that his family is surrounded with love and support.

    And...can I just say that I love how insightful you are. I love that you can draw deeper meaning from lackluster produce. I always feel that I learn and think when reading your blog!

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  8. I have things to ponder as well. Wish I could sit down with you for a muffin and a chat. Those look delicious.

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  9. So sorry to hear about your friend. That must have been such a big blow to him and his family. You have a bit heart!

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  10. So sorry to hear about your friend. Nothing is more frightening than reminders of our mortality. I have a colleague younger than me with two young kids just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and a best friend of a best friend who got diagnosed with cancer when she was pregnant and died before her son was 9 months. Life can be so scary.

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