Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Potato Humor

I'd read the prompts for NaBloPoMo in advance before we left for vacation, and honestly, some of them had me stumped.  Like the favorite joke, for example.  For all of the pranksters and jokesters in my family, I don't have an arsenal of jokes at my disposal.
 I asked my son, and he told me this one: "What kind of shirt does a golfer wear?  A TEE shirt!"

"Do you know why that's funny?" I asked him.

"No," he admitted.

I explained the joke, and then asked, "so how did you learn that joke?"

He shrugged.  "I read it on a popsicle stick today."

And really, isn't that just the sort of place you learned some of the favorite silly jokes from your elementary school years?

I asked around at the family reunion we went to, and the really funny thing?  Is that most people are still telling the same jokes they told in the third grade.

Potatoes are in season at my CSA.  So here are some seasonal third grade jokes for you ... and a potato salad.
 
How do you describe an angry potato? Boiling Mad.
What do you call a baby potato? A small fry!
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
Why did the potato cross the road? He saw a fork up ahead. Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a commentator.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
Why do potatoes make good detectives?  Because they keep their eyes peeled.

GROAN.

Potato Salad (the bad-for-you old school kind)

A few red potatoes, boiled and sliced attractively
The spring onions (not to be confused with green onions) you didn't use from your CSA share last week
Some parsley that is about to go to seed, chopped finely
Hard cooked eggs, if you like them (I'm against segregated eggs, myself)
Anything else you feel like throwing in there, chopped finely
Stir together:
Mayonnaise, to your liking
Apple cider or red wine vinegar, a splash to thin the mayonnaise
A splash of water
Salt, preferably sea salt, to sprinkle liberally


Taste off the dressing.  If you don't like it, add something.  If you like it, pour it all over the top of your potatoes.  Refrigerate to let the flavors blend.
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7 comments:

Esperanza said...

Oh potato humor. You give me gas. ;D

Lavender Luz said...

What beer do potatoes drink?

Budweiser, because this spud's for you.

We crack me up.

Kristin said...

I think I'm going to have to hide these jokes from my two younger boys or I will be hearing potato jokes for weeks.

Jjiraffe said...

Hee! I cannot remember a joke to save my life. I mean, they instantly disappear from my brain the moment I hear them. It's totally bizarre.

Emily @ablanket2keep said...

Love the potato humor. We always have a stash of popsicles in the freezer and when my Hubby finishes one he turns into a little kid asking me the riddle. LOL!

Monet said...

Hilarious. And I love the bad-for-you potato salad. It is good for the sould.

Kathy said...

Very fun! The only jokes I can ever remember are all from grade school too...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was dead

Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

What did the third monkey fall out of the tree?

Monkey see, monkey do.

Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree?

Peer pressure!

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